How to Overcome the Fear of No In Direct Sales


As we all navigate this whacky new world we’re living in with COVID-19, I’ve been chatting with a lot of ladies and coaching a lot of clients who are in the direct sales world, and there is one thing I keep hearing. 

I keep hearing, “I am afraid of people saying no.”

When I was a direct sales leader, if I heard something twice, pretty close together, it meant that it was a need or question from my team that needed to be tackled. So, y’all, that is what we are going to do today – we are going to tackle how the fear of no is impacting your business and how to change your mindset to overcome that fear. 

At the end of the day, you’re in direct sales. You are a salesperson. Do you know what that means? You’re going to hear no, and that is totally okay!! You just must change the way you think about that no response. 

Think about it this way, when the waitress asks if you want to see the dessert menu and you say no – is it a big deal? Absolutely not! What you’re asking is no different, and you need to learn to embrace the no and let it roll on off your back so you can move on. 

When growing your business, it’s important always to be asking for what you want even if you foster a fear of no, because in reality, if you never ask the question, the answer will always be no. Right? Bet you’ve never thought about it that way!

We all have fears that hold us back, but overcoming them will make us stronger as individuals and will help our business grow. When I was in direct sales, I tried to keep in mind the following four nuggets of guidance when trying to overcome my fear of no… let’s dive in.


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Want a proven plan for growing your business without feeling like you're chasing your tail? The Direct Sellers Business Blueprint explains the 4 key areas you must master to build a simplified, systematic direct sales business. It will even tell you which area to tackle first, so you can stop feeling overwhelmed by what to do next. It's completely FREE for a limited time.


When we understand the value of what we’re offering – the value of our business, our product, our service – it’s easier to accept a no. When you ask someone to host a party or join your team, and they say no, but you understand their offer’s value, it’s easier to accept and sometimes influence a change in response. 

For example, when I asked someone to host a party, I was fully aware of what HUGE value that party could bring a hostess. You know why? I did the math, ladies, and y’all know numbers don’t lie! I took a look at my commission versus what the average host saved in the product from each party. Nine times out of ten, the hostess was earning more free products than I was earning in commission. That is a massive value! So even when someone said no, I realized it as their loss and moved on to the next, continuing to share that value. 

So, what is your value? What is the value of your party experience, your mentorship, your customer page content – look at what you’re sharing and understand the value it provides to others. If you don’t have a firm understanding of this, taking a no is a little more difficult. 


This is huge, ladies. If your heart is not in the right place, your asks and offers will never seem genuine. Whenever you offer a host opportunity or a chance to join your team, it’ll come off as spammy, a little desperate, because it won’t be genuine, it won’t contain that real, raw excitement. It’ll be like that icky used car salesman, and that is not the type of sales we’re looking to pursue, right? 

As direct sellers, you often need to check your heart to make sure you’re coming from a service mindset – it changes how we interact with people. 

If someone says no, and your heart is in the right place, and you understand your value, it’s easier to redirect the conversation. You can say, “I totally understand, no worries at all, but I’d love to have you join my customer group to hang out with a bunch of other awesome ladies.” 

Once they’re in your customer group, they have the opportunity to get to know you a little better and build that genuine relationship while also learning about the value of what you have to offer. Then, they’re hooked!

So when you hear a no, but your heart is in the right place of service, think about how your product or business could serve them and provide a solution that could help change their lives – that’s when the magic starts to happen. A no is not the end of the road, come at your response with your heart in the right place and a service mindset, and you’ll see success.


This may be the most important point, y’all. We all tend to look at our success as directly related to who says yes or no to us, seeing it as a failure or personal attack if someone says no to what we’re offering or asking of them. 

But ladies, if you’re providing value, service, and caring for people in your business – it is not about you. It could be they’ve got a wedding, funeral, and a baby shower in one week and they can’t process doing one more thing. It could be that they’re worried about getting enough friends to get involved in a party. It’s nothing to do with you!

Let’s go back to the waitress parallel: if you say no to the ketchup or the extra soda, is your waitress going to take that as a personal attack? Absolutely not. And neither should you in your direct sales business. 

When someone says no, simply offer them the opportunity to join your customer group or provide your contact details so you can share some free juicy tips and keep them in the loop.

Keep lovin’ on them and providing value, and maybe someday there will come a time where they’re ready to dive in and say yes to hosting, or they’ll have a need for that product. If now isn’t that time, that’s okay, and it’s definitely not personal!


There are so many situations in life where we let our fear take the driver’s seat, and y’all that just won’t serve you. 

The question I like to ask is, “Are you more afraid of the no than you are of an empty calendar?”. When I was in direct sales and sat down to look at my calendar for the next 30 days – I was more afraid of white space than chasing asks to generate business. I was more fearful of running out of business than I was of hearing no – and that’s where I found my success

During COVID-19, many of us let the fear that people would say no or be offended by us even asking or working during a tough time stop our growth. But, if you lead with value and service, no one is going to be offended. Be confident in the value you’re providing. Come at it with a heart of service, and you will be just fine.

Done is better than perfect, I like to say, so even if the asks aren’t perfect, don’t let the fear of asking stop you altogether! That’s no way to grow.


One way to combat a no is to perfect your ask. In addition to considering the above tips, you can read our blog on 5 Steps to Improve Your Ask & Get a Yes. With these resources, you’ll be unstoppable soon. So go get it, girl, say goodbye to the fear and negative mindsets, and chase those big goals.


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Want a proven plan for growing your business without feeling like you're chasing your tail? The Direct Sellers Business Blueprint explains the 4 key areas you must master to build a simplified, systematic direct sales business. It will even tell you which area to tackle first, so you can stop feeling overwhelmed by what to do next. It's completely FREE for a limited time.

If you loved these tips, make sure you check out our digital guide for mastering the 4 key areas of your direct sales business. Learn proven methods to book more parties, host coach like a champ, sell more products, and build a bigger team. 

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Hey, I'm Mary!

My passion is helping you simplify and streamline your direct sales business using tried and true systems that reduce overwhelm and help you reach your business goals even faster! Find out more about what we do here.

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Confused about what to do next in your direct sales business? Need a clear, simple plan on how to grow? Grab our free Direct Sellers Business Blueprint and learn the 4 key areas you must master to grow your direct sales business!

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